Confucian style

I

D:rufengdajia

in psychology, there is a famous "hedgehog rule":

in winter, two hedgehogs keep each other warm in order to survive.

if they are too close to each other, they will sting each other, but they are too far away to resist the cold.

you must find a suitable distance in order not to be hurt but also to feel warm.

people getting along with others is like hedgehogs huddling together to keep warm.

the mind is not narrow, things are not absolute, and people are not extreme.

in order to understand human feelings, comfortable and comfortable.

the width of the center is three inches, so don't worry about it

Hugo said: "the broadest thing in the world is the ocean, what is wider than the sea is the sky, and what is wider than the sky is the human mind."

small-minded people often do not have a good life.

people have thousands of calculations, but the sky is only calculated, and if they go too far, they will suffer great losses sooner or later.

Wang Rong, a famous scholar in the Wei and Jin dynasties, was born in the famous Langfu Wang family.

the manors and fields under his name are spread all over the north and south of the river, which can be called a rich country.

but he holds his own teeth every day and calculates day and night, so he can't stand others to take advantage of him.

seeing that the fruit is growing well, Wang Rong intends to sell it on the market.

but he is also worried that when others buy the fruit home, they will take the core to plant the tree, so that the fruit is not unique to his family.

Wang Rong ordered people to use fine cones to drill the core of the fruit, and then sell the fruit.

fruit cannot sprout, so it will not affect his business.

later, the imperial court ordered Guang to accept sages, and Wang Rong was recommended.

just as he was about to enter the court with one foot, someone told him that he had drilled a hole in the core of the fruit.

the emperor thought, "it is simply the misfortune of the people to have such a narrow-minded person!"

Wang Rong's road to success was cut off.

as the old saying goes, "what is lost is what is gained

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what you calculate here will eventually have to be returned in another way

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A narrow-minded person who cares too much all day will make his life narrower and narrower.

it is nothing but peace of mind for a person to live a lifetime, so there is no need to quarrel with himself.

if the heart is haggling, there are complaints everywhere; if the heart is relaxed, it is always spring.

make room for three feet in case of trouble, and be more friendly

there is a saying in Cai Gentan: "if you can't do it, you must know the way to take a step back.

if it's all right, be sure to give up three-thirds of the work.

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giving priority to others in an accident, treating others with leniency is virtue, and benefiting others is the foundation of self-interest.

to be kind to others is not to be without temper, but to give way to three points to avoid unnecessary disputes.

Yue Yunpeng, a crosstalk actor from Deyun Society, began to work as a waitress in a restaurant at the age of 15.

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once, he accidentally registered two bottles of beer ordered at table 3 on table 5. In fact, the total cost was only 6 yuan.

Yue Yunpeng refunded the money to the customer on the spot, apologized and gave away two extra bottles of beer.

the guests were still adamant and scolded Yue Yunpeng for more than three hours.

finally alerted the manager, Yue Yunpeng not only lost the guest's entire meal money of 352 yuan, but also lost his job.

after many years, Yue Yunpeng talked about it on TV and said frankly that he could not understand why the guest had to be unforgiving.

in life, thirty years east and thirty years west of the river, it is inevitable to encounter a temporary dilemma.

Don't do too much. When you stand on high ground, you should leave a way for the people below.

giving way to three feet in case of trouble is not only the self-cultivation of life, but also the wisdom of handling the world.

treat people far away, avoid being right or wrong

Hu Shi said: "between people, we must know how to abide by the limits."

do not offend, do not disturb, so as not to cause trouble and maintain a good relationship. "

when Hu Shi was teaching at Peking University, he lived with his wife in the faculty dormitory of the university.

his wife Jiang Dongxiu, who has nothing to do at home all day, likes to play mahjong all night.

affect the rest of the surrounding neighbors, the dormitory administrator, because Hu Shi's face is also difficult to say.

many people don't understand that playing mahjong is not a big deal, so Hu Shi doesn't have to move.

they said, "the dean is all your students. What are you afraid of?"

Hu Shi replied, "it is precisely because he is my student that I can't bother him."

the feelings between people, light is good, light can last for a long time.

the feeling is too strong, the distance is too close, and it is almost time to part.

Master Hongyi said: "the friendship between gentlemen is as light as water; clinging to the image is thousands of miles away."

most of the time, when we get along with people, we don't know how to be close to others, but we don't know how to be distant.

if you get too close, you will get into trouble, cause trouble, and have gratitude and resentment.

get better, two people wear the same pair of trousers; after separationOld age and death do not interact with each other.

it is better to hold a mentality of asking for nothing and not to ask or disturb each other.

in the journey of life, it is better to have fun at first sight than never to get tired of it.