read at ten o'clock

duhaoshu

I have read such a sentence: "to maintain a good relationship, it always requires a little selfishness and a little indifference."

Yes, it will hurt the heart to get too close between people, and it will be cold to help too much.

if you treat others with all your heart, you may get disdain.

if you spare no effort to help others, you may get worse.

not everyone is worthy of your sincere delivery, and not everything needs your help.

it is a virtue to choose good deeds, and enough is wisdom.

do not interfere in other people's household chores

as the saying goes, it is difficult for honest officials to break household chores, let alone outsiders who do not know the inside story.

when others need to talk, just listen; when a friend is sad, comfort is good.

No matter how good a relationship is, you should distinguish between your own affairs and those of others.

this is not only respect for others, but also self-protection.

Zhao Gang and Wang Fei are buddies who grew up together. If anyone is in trouble, the other person will not hesitate to lend a hand.

but something happened not long ago that made the relationship between the two take a turn for the worse.

Zhao Gang quarreled with his wife Xiao Li, who led the child back to her mother's house.

for half a month, I turned off my phone and went to my husband's house to pick it up. The family was as cold as ice to Zhao Gang.

Wang Fei volunteered to go with Zhao Gang again. I'm sure he can persuade Xiao Li to come back.

at the dinner table, Wang Fei became a peacemaker in front of Xiaoli's family.

"how can a couple not quarrel? it's almost done. It doesn't matter if you don't go home all the time, do you?"

none of the people at the table spoke to each other, and Xiao Li's brother said, "what did he do to my sister? their family looked down on my sister!"

Wang Fei said, "what do you children know? it's none of your sister's business!"

Xiao Li's brother slammed the bowls and chopsticks on the table: "Why do you come to my house as an outsider to tell me what to do?"

the air suddenly solidified, everyone tacitly pulled the meal in front of us, and no one said a word.

Wang Fei pretended to answer a phone call, left awkwardly, and decided never to visit Zhao Gang's house again.

later, a mutual friend sent word that Zhao Gang and Xiao Li had made up, but they were very dissatisfied with Wang Fei, saying that he would only cause trouble and not help.

the two men seem to have disappeared and have been out of touch ever since.

No matter how good a friend is, he is an outsider; no matter how hard the relationship is, you must keep your balance.

in other people's household chores, there are emotions we can't see and entanglements that we can't touch.

relying solely on "warm blood", it is possible to do bad things with good intentions, and blind "ancient warm-hearted" will only be thankless.

you are as smart as you, do not judge other people's chores, do not talk, do not interfere, do not cross the line.

if it involves pecuniary interests, don't help indiscriminately

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the Orange family has two apartments. Her second uncle's child has obviously been admitted to high school, and the second uncle wants to borrow one to come to the city to study with her.

Father Orange readily agreed.

but until Mingming went to live in college, the second uncle didn't say anything about moving out.

sometimes, when Orange goes to the second uncle's house, the neighbors think that the orange family is the guest and the second uncle is the owner of the house.

recently, the second uncle began to pick up the house, painting the walls and buying more furniture, and the second aunt was also busy shopping.

when I asked, I found out that my uncle wanted to use this house as a wedding room for him when he was about to graduate.

Father Orange looked at this posture and became anxious:

"I let you live in a house for seven or eight years without asking for a penny, and you still want to marry daughter-in-law here. Are you going to stay or not?"

the second uncle's face doesn't matter: "I don't have the money to buy a house. You can't let your nephew have a wife and no place to live!" At the worst, I'll pay some rent. "

Father Orange got angry and quarreled with his second uncle, saying that if he didn't leave, he would call the police, and the family moved out.

when the second uncle left, he left a sentence: "you are no longer a brother in this life."

pecuniary interests have always been a sensitive topic, with how many relatives turn against each other and how many friends make enemies.

greet each other with a smile when borrowing money and be extremely jealous when you ask for money.

as the old saying goes, if you don't save the poor in an emergency, think twice before you act, especially between relatives and friends.

because among them, there is not only the blood friendship of "breaking bones and tendons", but also the disputed interests of "continuous cutting and messy management".

when it comes to financial interests, do not help indiscriminately, which is not only to take care of yourself, but also to take into account the overall situation.

if you are busy beyond the bottom line, don't interfere

writer Feng Jicai said: "only by keeping the bottom line can one achieve a successful self and a successful life."

but there are people who challenge your principles and test your bottom line under the banner of asking for help.

if you follow the wishes of others, you will lose your own happiness.

A couple opened a restaurant. They operated in good faith, tasted delicious and won a lot of repeat customers.

looking at the booming business, relatives also became hot-eyed and recommended their unemployed children to work in restaurants.

husband and wife know this kind of relationship.The department was not easy to manage at all, but it was agreed bravely.

the couple had to accompany the smiling face to explain, apologize and promise improvement to the guests.

A friend in the beverage business called and said, "I have a batch of drinks that are about to expire, with a lot of money. Please help me and sell them in the restaurant!"

the husband and wife look embarrassed, but when they think that the drinks that are about to expire are mixed with the drinks of the new date, the customers should not be able to find out, so they do a favor to their friends and give them a favor.

before long, some customers drank their drinks, vomited and diarrhea, suspected food poisoning, and the restaurant was asked to close down for rectification.

the bottom line is a person's quality; the bottom line is the lifeblood of an enterprise.

there is no need for others to sacrifice themselves, and to help others, you have to keep the bottom line.

Don't interfere if you are busy beyond the bottom line.

because good is misplaced, it becomes evil.

not only broke his heart, but also broke the righteousness between friends.

be sorry for your favor, don't be kind

some people say: "Human nature is unaccustomed, and it makes sense to help every time."

Yes, if you wronged yourself, you will not win the favor of others; if you help against your will, you may not be able to make a wide range of contacts.

Sister Zhang, a colleague, has to catch the subway to pick up her children from work every day, and she arrives late and leaves early several times, so the leader is short of naming and criticizing.

Xiao Li and Sister Zhang live not far away, so Sister Zhang offered to take a ride with Xiao Li.

when the company arranged to work overtime, Sister Zhang patted Xiao Li on the shoulder: "my family is really tied up. Please do it for me. I'll invite you to dinner later."

with the help of Xiao Li, Sister Zhang is in high spirits every day and no longer has the anxiety of being dishevelled and dishevelled.

however, Xiao Li's face darkened day by day, and his colleagues vaguely felt that Xiao Li hated the appearance of Sister Zhang.

the two met in the company corridor. Xiao Li was either busy reading the documents in his hands or looking at mobile phone messages, ignoring sister Zhang.

when eating in the canteen, Xiao Li deliberately sat far away from Sister Zhang.

during a chat, Xiao Li poured out his grievances to his colleagues:

"the gas money is never mentioned. Let me pick up the children with her. The children will eat, drink, kick and jump around for a while, making a mess in the car."

"Let me work overtime for her, and I have to order my own takeout, and several times the whole building is left with me and the security guard."

later, Xiao Li made an excuse to make a detour to and from work.

Sister Zhang was obviously unhappy because she couldn't get on the bus. "Xiao Li is such a bad guy," she said to everyone in the company. "everybody be careful."

Xiao Li did not expect that, out of kindness, he got slander and sarcasm in return.

if you give up your time, others may think that you have nothing to do and are not as good as good people to do it to the end.

if you give up your own interests, others will only smile, and then the clouds will be light.

if you are aggrieved by your favor, you'd better not be kind.

it's not cold, but you never know:

their own money to help, in exchange for gratitude, or unscrupulous for granted.

because this world is so unsentimental that there is no end to the human heart.

▽

there is a classic saying in the White Night Walk:

"there are two things in the world that cannot be looked directly at, one is the sun, and the other is the human heart."

the sun burns the eyes, and human nature hurts.

sometimes, others don't know how to be grateful and just regard help as a common occurrence.

sometimes, kindness does not get gratitude, but becomes a sharp weapon to hurt yourself.

be as kind as you are, be a smart person.

learn to refuse, your contribution will be valuable and your dedication will be seen.